23 laps around the world

Yes, I know it’s 23 laps around the sun, but for me it’s fortunately been 23 laps around the world.

As I turn 23 on May 23rd I’m challenged to reflect on my life on this beautiful planet.

Being my golden year, I feel a certain aura and calling to make it my best year yet.

To be honest, I feel like this past year I’ve lived everyday to my fullest capacity.

Sure, there were days where I did nothing, said nothing, and felt nothing. Those days were hard. Yet, there were many more days filled with so much joy, self-discovery, and community building. Where I not only traveled the world but the depths of my mind and heart.

I’ve pushed myself this past year.

I’ve pushed myself far outside of my comfort zone, to discover new places, talk to strangers, and seek out daunting experiences.

This past year I graduated from UCSB magna cum laude, I launched my blog soshedares, I went on a week long roadtrip with strangers, I learned how to rock climb, I solo traveled domestically and internationally, I embraced my natural curls, I visited three new countries, I got my first full-time corporate job, I moved from Santa Barbara, CA, I had a partner, I read books and listened to podcasts that changed my perspective, I hiked hundreds of miles, and I traveled thousands more.

I learned a lot about myself this past year. I learned not to be afraid of self discovery. That it’s a beautiful and strenuous process. I learned it take times to open your heart and mind to who you truly are and hope to be.

Once you do open up – you’re suddenly flooded with all your dream and aspirations, drowning under the pressure to succeed. When you do find your footing, realize you can stand and the pool is only 4 ft deep but thousands of meters wide – you realize there’s so much left for you to discover but you don’t need to be drowning to see it.

Once you regain your footing, air rushes into your lungs. You look around you every which way and see all the possibilities. You stumble again – don’t fall victim again to the plight of opportunity overload.

You don’t need to and I would not recommend pursuing all your opportunities at once.

You’ll end up drowning, unaware of which way is up and down with the ground merely 2 inches below you.

You’ll end up driving yourself mad – to be, see, and do everything.

The greatest lesson I learned this year is to slow down.

Just slow down.

Hold onto the railing, take a deep breath, and look inwards.

Examine what you’re doing each day. How you’re spending your time. Who you’re spending your time with. Ask yourself is this what you really want out of your day to day?

Ask yourself would you be happy five years from now, living your days as you are today.

If the answer is no, it’s time to make a change.

The world can wait. Those arbitrary deadlines society has set in place for you don’t matter. I repeat, they do not matter.

Don’t worry about the future, worry about the present as that’s the only thing you can change right now in this very moment.

The future is outside of our hands. All you can do is prepare yourself.

—

So when I say slow – I mean sluggishly slow

I spend maybe an hour to get ready each day

when I say get ready, I don’t mean makeup

I mean get myself ready to take on the day

I wake up – look out my window and examine the weather. Is mother earth sad, happy, excited, depressed?

I respond to how she feels. I take in that energy and either choose to use it as ammunition to succeed or as an excuse to evade my stressors.

Seasonal depression is very real. Mother earth has emotions and stressors just like we do. So I respond. I do nothing for the first 30 minutes of each day.

I look around, I wonder, I ask questions and search for answers.

Then I move on.

After I’ve given myself the time to think, reflect, and appreciate my surroundings. I drink water, make breakfast, and continue my day.

While my practice of nothingness each morning isn’t necessarily the traditional from of meditation, it’s my form of meditation.

It eases my mind and brings me peace to have time to think and just be present each morning.

Throughout my day, if I feel like I’m lost and overwhelmed, I’ll recognize those feelings, stop what I’m doing and just do nothing until I feel at ease again.

I close my eyes, breathe in and out, maybe go for a walk and just watch the bird’s entranced in their world.

I watch a male bird dance and do all he can to catch the gaze of his female crush. I watch him flutter his feathers, tickle her throat, and hope she takes his heart.

I watch the birds deal with their own stressors, joys, and obstacles. In that moment when my moment is focused on none other than the blue jays perched on my lemon tree, I’m at peace.

I breathe in once more, appreciate the immense beauty around me and continue about my day.

This my daily routine – and I love it

I love being able to slow down and just watch from a distance the world move incredibly fast, slow, and not at all around me.

I feel as though I’m frozen in time and given the opportunity to observe, analyze, and appreciate all that I have.

I am forever grateful for this beautiful life I have. I have found my place. I have found peace. And I have great joy.

Thank you for 23 beautiful years. Cheers to many more of self discovery, fulfillment, and joy. Who knows what I’ll uncover next 😉